All posts by BeingCharis

Trans & disabled Speaker, Writer, Model, and cat parent
#sickbody, ankylosing spondylitis, Charis, chronic disease, chronic pain, disability, health

Helping Charis

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Those of you who have been reading my blog, and those of you who know me personally know I’m good at sharing important, gruesome, sad, exciting, powerful pieces of my life so others’ lives may be impacted positively. You have seen that I use my voice to make a difference. You’ve witnessed as I have raised thousands of dollars for the Arthritis Foundation, as I’ve shared my story openly on my blog and in local and national news stories about healthcare.  Those of you who know me best know that I love hosting potlucks – what you may not know is that I love hosting potlucks so much because I love bringing people together who would not otherwise meet.  I love creating community, introducing strangers, being a nucleus to a gathering.

Image by Brian Baker, used with permission
Image by Brian Baker, used with permission

Continue reading Helping Charis →

family, Heroes, Love, poetry

I choose to be beautiful

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I choose to be beautiful.

Charis Hill image
Charis Hill image

I choose to have conversations with people who sit on street corners with signs that say, “homeless, hungry, please help.” Because, as J.K. Rowling says, through Dumbledore, “If you want to know what a man’s like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals.” Continue reading I choose to be beautiful →

#sickbody, ankylosing spondylitis, Arthritis, chronic disease, chronic pain, disability, Invisible disease, sickness, spondylitis, spondyloarthritis

Pain is my fishbowl

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Many of us are aware of the U.S. Marine Corps tagline, “Pain is just weakness leaving the body.” There’s also a similar, often-referenced quote by Lance Armstrong:

Pain is temporary. It may last a minute, or an hour, or a day, or a year, but eventually it will subside and something else will take its place. If I quit, however, it lasts forever.

By these definitions, my body is a tomb of never-ending weakness and I’m in a perpetual state of temporary pain (and in my case it doesn’t matter if I keep fighting or quit, the pain is still right here with me). Don’t believe everything you think, it was created by someone else’s perspective first.

When people freak out about bruises or scrapes on my body I have never understood the reason. What’s the big deal? Only in these aesthetic instances can I spout the “pain is temporary” mantra and people will understand that I’m just good at sucking it up, so to speak, and they leave it at that.  Most people do not understand that there is deeper, unseen pain that can last forever in our temporary bodies.

©2015, Glenn Jones/Ikona Photography H/MUA Ashley Caudron
©2015, Glenn Jones/Ikona Photography
H/MUA Ashley Caudron

Continue reading Pain is my fishbowl →

Advocacy, Black Lives Matter, Current Events, Equality, Inequality, Politics, Racism, Sexism

Standing in Solidarity: Black Lives Matter

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I didn’t plan on writing this piece about #BlackLivesMatter.  I wanted to watch how it all played out without getting too involved. Truthfully I was afraid that I would say something wrong that would make me look unintelligent and uninformed. Then I realized that by being silent about it, somehow I was allowing more damage to happen.  I write this from a place of vulnerability, love, and hope.  I’m willing to be brave for those whose voices are drowning in fear. I hope to amplify the voices of my black brothers and sisters as they scream, even when it seems no one is listening. I hope to be corrected, as needed, by those whose lives are in danger and whose shoes I can never occupy. I will keep listening.

Continue reading Standing in Solidarity: Black Lives Matter →